Wednesday 29 August 2018

Going in a different direction

Hi everyone.

Some of you may have followed this blog “back in the day” and watched me lose weight, but, unlike the blog title, I did not “keep it off”.

This is a pattern of mine, and has been for the past 11 years of my life.

It’s time for it to stop, and for that to happen, I’ve decided to try something new.

I’ve done lots of research, and since this blog really helped me last time, I have started writing a brand new blog.

If you’re interested, the address is:

Balloonweightloss.blogspot.com

I haven’t told the people around me yet, and I’m not sure if anyone ever subscribed to my blog because I never learned how to use blogspot well enough to find out.... But if you did, you’re in for a sneak preview.

Enjoy.

This blog will not be updated further.

Peace out - Vicky.


Monday 22 February 2016

Week one weigh-in

Hey there!

So I've just returned from my first week weigh in.... and I lost... 9.5lbs! (That's 4.3 Kg to all you Europeans)

I'm really pleased with that, but now is not the time to celebrate. I've managed one week of eating well, but I have 7 months until the Great North Run, and a whole lot of weight to lose before then.

Here are some of the foods I've been eating over the past week.....


Chilli con carne with rice & salad
Chicken & All the veggies with brown rice / quinoa 


My favourite weekday breakfast - overnight oats with yogurt & berries

My weekend breakfast - smoked salmon with scrambled eggs, spinach & onions

'Courgetti' with prawns, tomatoes & pesto

Beef goulash with mashed swede, roast potatoes and sauerkraut (amazing and hands down the best thing I've eaten... Ever)

Chickpea & beetroot salad



I'm trying to keep variety & not eat the same thing every day, and make food that is delicious, healthy, and within the slimming world guidelines. 

It seems to be working! I'm really happy so far, and this week I'm adding exercise back into the mix, but not running yet. 

I'll be back with more updates later in the week :-) 

Friday 19 February 2016

Burgers and Suchlike

Oh hey there! 

It's Friday, I started this new lifestyle at the start of the week. I'd be lying if I said it was difficult.

Week one is easy; you know you'll lose weight, you know you're full of motivation, you've been out and bought a whole pile of vegetables. 

My weekly weigh-in is a Monday, which I think is a great idea. If there's any time you're going to want to jump off the wagon and onto a stuffed crust pizza and into a bottle of red wine, it's going to be the weekend. I certainly feel like once I get this far into a week, why would I want to spoil all my hard work before I get weighed? However, I was sitting at my desk today at work, daydreaming about going home and cracking open a bottle of Malbec and ordering a parmo. 

There's a difference though, because this week I'm breaking my red wine & takeaway Friday habit. 

I'm meeting up with some friends tonight and we're going to Byron. I know this isn't ideal when trying to eat healthy, but I'm prepared. 

I've eaten great all day (no carbs with my dinner, only used 0.5  of my allowance of 15 syns, and I'm planning ahead. Normally, I'd quite happily tuck into a giant burger with bacon, cheese, mustard, relish and whatever else took my fancy. There'd always be a side of chips, and a couple of ales to wash it down. 

I've looked at the menu this week, and I learned that Byron (the menu is linked above) do "bun- free" burgers. They take away the bun and provide you with a free side salad instead. 

I've checked online and according to Slimming World forums, a Skinny Byron beef burger is 12.5 syns, it's actually within my day's allowance :).

However, looking into the menu, there seems to be even healthier choices- a mushroom burger, a chicken breast burger, there's even beetroot salads. I'm really looking forward to my meal and I'm glad I planned ahead.

It's also very much an achievement that I didn't crack open a bottle of wine and jump into my PJs. I'm proud of myself! 

I will be posting again on Monday / Tuesday with my week one weigh-in results, and a couple of pictures of the food I've been enjoying this week (including the burger). 

Wish  me luck.


P.S I don't want to continue posting about my blogs on Facebook forever, so to avoid missing any, you can enter your email address in the box on the right. I don't even get told when someone subscribes, but you get an email every time a new post appears. 

Monday 15 February 2016

New perspectives

Hello!

It's been a very long time since I updated my blog. Here's why. You can't have a blog called "losing weight and keeping it off" while you're gaining the weight you lost.

Most of my friends are aware, than in the time between 2013 and 2015, I lost 6 and a half stone. 

Here's a picture if you like.

At one point I would go to the gym 6 times a week, eat 90% clean, and could run 5km in 31 mins. I used to go to my gym and talk to people who wished to join, inspiring them. I slept well, I felt organised and like my life was on track. However all I saw when I looked in the mirror was a morbidly obese imperfect person. 

I didn't expect to be sitting here, a mere 14 months later, trying to justify gaining it all back. All of it, probably more. There's no excuse, no medical reason... I stopped exercising and started replacing my runners high with a chocolate and takeaway high. I did try in this time to get healthy again, I even did a month of The Body Coach 90 day SSS Plan and really thought I was going to get back to my lightest.....

But I didn't. 

I continued to gain weight at a phenomenal rate. I got a new job, so the people there never knew the "healthier" me. I used that as a bit of a crutch to eat all of the time. 

I think about it all day every day, how much weight I've gained, how I don't exercise any more, how I don't run. Apps like 'Timehop' reminding me every day were like a little voice saying 'remember when you were smaller and you didn't even realise?' or 'Remember when that lovely jacket fit you' I felt / feel like such a failure, so much so that I keep trying, almost setting myself up for failure, because all I could think about was how I've never done what I planned to (and the name of my blog) - Losing weight and keeping it off!

So here's what I'm doing about it:


  1. Accountability I'm writing this blog for me, not you. I aim to write at least once a week to check in on my life and reflect on what I'm doing right (and what I'm doing wrong)
  2. Progression reporting - I will weigh myself once a week. I'll post it too. 
  3. Target setting - I somehow have found myself running the GNR 2016. More to come on this later
  4. Support - I've joined Slimming world. I need to do something to stop myself eating until I feel sick- and I think the support of weekly sessions will help me with this. 
  5. Positivity - The negative stuff is written out now - it's time to forgive myself and move on. It's easier to say than do, but I'm ready to wipe the slate clean and focus on rebuilding my energy levels, exercising, and eating healthier. 

It's time to move on, learn to run again, and learn to be healthy. It's not going to be easy, but I'm ready for the challenge. This time, I know I'm ready. I don't have a choice. 

Next post will bring good news, I'm promising myself. 



Sunday 2 November 2014

A German lesson

Hi everyone,

Good to see you!

I thought I'd start today with a word from the Germans. While not a particularly nice word, I feel it is appropriate for where I am right now, and I'm sure I'm not alone in this....


" innerer Schweinehund "

Yes friends, that is a pig-dog. Your 'innere Schweinehund' is your inner pig-dog. 

I follow a few health bloggers, from all over the place, and some from Germany. When I saw people talking about people conquering their inneren Schweinehund; I read a little more about it on good old Wiki.

On it's own, the word Schweinehund is not a very nice one, however using it against yourself probably isn't a good way to look at it either. Your innerer Schweinehund is weak, lazy, and probably most prominent after an all inclusive holiday, or a few weeks of tactfully avoiding the gym. 

My Innerer Schweinehund has been taking over my life for the last few weeks. Ever since I did the Newcastle Stampede, and actually a little bit before, I've avoided exercise, I've eaten like an animal, I've drank more alcohol than I generally do these days, and I've chowed down takeaways like it's going out of fashion. I'm disgusted at myself, I really am. It's not all my innerer Schweinehund's fault- I've knowingly done it. It was me who bought the cookies, it was me who drank the wine, it was me who ordered the pizza. 



I feel like I've taken 3 steps backwards. My jeans are getting tight. I'm avoiding tight fitting clothing, and I feel bloated, sick and ashamed. I have spent weeks waiting for someone to slap me out of it and tell me to get my shit together.... But no one did. Of course they didn't. No one told me to lose weight. No one forced me to start running. No one pushed me to get into a routine. 

It was me. 

Why was I waiting around for someone to force me help me, when I was the one making myself feel bad? The only reason I feel/ felt so awful is because I know I am better than this. I know I can plan, eat well, and improve my fitness. And that knowledge will make you want to keep going.
Time to stop feeling sorry for myself, get up off my out-of-shape, squat-missing ass, and DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. Ich überwinde meinen inneren Schweinehund!

If you're in a rut, and if you feel like you're in the same boat, it's time to do something about it. Make a conscious effort to notice everything you eat, drink, and how much exercise you're fitting into your day. You will feel better if you take every day as a challenge to improve. 
Did I mention the Stampede already? A few weeks ago, I did the Newcastle Stampede with some friends. It was a 10k race with 21(ish) obstacles. Aside from smashing my knee in, and twisting my already-twisted ankle, IT WAS AWESOME. Here's some unseen pics!


Add caption

I would just like to mention that I've only just realised which person on this picture is me. Ha!


Monday 27 October 2014

10 months later

Hi!

It's been 10 months since I started my blog, and approx. 7 since I stopped updating it. I had a bad couple of weeks, and felt I'd be letting everyone and myself down by trying to talk about being healthy. After that, it just became too long, and I didn't know if I could come back to it. I still thought about this little thing all the time- I enjoyed updating it, even the posts which 1 or 2 people read.

I really liked being able to set my weekly thoughts jotted down, and organise them, and it made me feel clarity I didn't know was possible. I'm glad to be picking this up again, and hope to update at least once a week. I will try for more often and will make them all waaaaay more fun than this post will be.

I've learned a lot about myself over the past 10 months; some good, some not so good. 

Good:


  • If I put my mind to it, I can lose weight (At my lightest, I'd lost 3st 5lbs since 6th January 2014)
  • I can run 10km in 73 minutes- and have no doubt I can do it faster.
  • I can run 5km in 29 minutes- and have no doublt I can do it faster.
  • I can sort, I can clarify, I can improve. 

Bad
  • Failing to plan leads to me stressing out, giving up, and feeling miserable
  • I am not/ was not prepared for injuries
  • I can eat a whole sharing bag of handcooked crisps in one evening
  • I can worry, I can exaggerate, I can put pressure on myself.

The only time I feel good is with a plan. And that's why I've started work on '2015' already. MY YEAR. I'm going to learn from my mistakes over the past 12 months and I'm going to take examples of mine (and friends'- many of the people around me are doing so great with getting fit and losing weight, I'm so proud!!) triumphs to keep me motivated. 

In fact, by the end of 2015, I want to be at my initial target weight. 

*DRUMROLL* 

11st 7lbs. 

A total of 8 stone (50kg) lost (since I started counting, anyway) over approx 30 months

2 stone 3lbs to go. (Let's see what I weigh on 1st Jan, I don't intend to put on weight before then but if the last few weeks are anything to go by....) 

I Can't wait. 

I have plans, I have actions, I have goals, I have time, I have a fucking great year ahead of me. 

Watch this space. 


P.s I am fully aware that it is October, and I shouldn't be planning from January. I am going to do something to sort out the next couple of months, but right now, I'm avoiding everything that happens in the next few weeks because I'm to scared to deal with the fact that I'm going to Cameroon and I have no plan to fall back on.